cellini's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I got a real date with Lauren Guess who has a real date with Lauren on Sunday night? Hint: It's me. Not Saturday because she's traveling back from NYC. So it's not like I got relegated to the shit night. Also, neither of us has a conventional job and days of the week don't have the same significance as they do to most people. This isn't why I want to date her, and maybe this was a very shitty thing for me to do, but I made a point of putting 'Date with Lauren [last name]' on the shared calendar that Trish can see. Because I know it will drive her up the wall with jealousy. They were best friends in middle school and then had a falling out where they became serious frenemies. Then Lauren went on to sign a multi-album deal with Virg1n records while Trish did fuck-all and is now an HR person at some boring transportation logistics company that runs a warehouse or something. So Trish has a bit of a complex about her anyway and sort of always has. And I've noticed this sort of hurt aspect in her when I mention that I'm doing something with Lauren or that the kids and I are going to hang out with her and her daughter. But at least it was just maybe us hanging out as friends before (and her fear was, in part, that we would talk about her and it wouldn't be flattering). Now, it says 'DATE WITH LAUREN' right there. So she's going to have to face the idea of the husband she walked out on having become extremely professionally successful with one movie about him and another film that he (I) just made, and another book deal in the works, and I look like a million bucks lately, and that ex-husband (me) is now dating Trish's far more successful and pretty pop star ex-friend and former teenage enemy. Ha! Fuck you, Trish. Fuck you. I hope it hurts. I hope it hurts a lot. Also, she's fat now. Probably an extra 40 pounds all around the middle. And she wears awful clothes and has no conversation whatever. We don't actually talk about Trish. There really isn't much to say. I hope this works out. There are younger and slightly hotter and easier women whom I could date, but they're mostly so fucking boring. Lauren is really smart and accomplished and makes cool shit all the time and that's the kind of woman I want to be with. 9:17 p.m. - 2017-12-14 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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