cellini's Diaryland Diary

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Crazy, Crazy Stuff

I just got booked to be on a rather big deal sort of a radio program this Saturday. This is a show on N*P*R which is broadcast live every weekend. About a million people listen to it. Guests are expected to be quirky and witty.

This is kind of a big deal.

I am getting very pissed off at this situation with my current publisher. They've had a week to look at the manuscript before anyone else. Meanwhile, I'm going to be talking to a million people this weekend and don't have a publisher and date to give out for the new book that I am going to be interviewed about. I told my agent that the time is up. The first look period is over and I want this book sent to other publishers NOW.

Also, I decided last night to do something totally gonzo and awesome. I have always wanted to make steel. I mean, dig the ir0n ore out of the ground and build a furnace and so forth. Paul and I were discussing this and it turns out that (having spent years studying and practicing traditional blacksm1thing) he put together a whole plan for such a demonstration a few years ago. It never happened for lack of funding, but the research is done. More importantly, he had set it up on the site of a historical ironw0rks with forges and so forth that have been sitting idle for the last 100 years. He knows the owners of the site and they are very much in favor of such a demo happening there.

Anyway, I was contemplating how awesome it would be to do this, and I was thinking about the cost in gas alone of driving to the nearest source of iron ore to dig it out of the ground and haul it back. And I started thinking about what sort of truck would be needed to haul this stuff home. Suddenly I realized something wonderful: Why not just let the F0rd Motor Company pay for it?

Documentary film. 30 minutes long. The whole process of making some knives and other tools out of steel - going ALL the way back and demonstrating how to mine the coal and make the charcoal and coke and construct a simple furn@ce. F0rd can load me a really bad-ass truck to haul the materials with, and pony up $50k for production costs while they're at it. The documentary would showcase American industrial production, since I'd be going to WVA to mine the coal and Detroit to pick up the truck and maybe Pittsburgh for the ire ore. I'd be happy to stick a Ford truck in the background of every shot if they will finance the production, which they could then air on Versus or wherever. And edit the footage into a 1 minute commercial, and put the whole thing online, etc.

Seriously, for $50k this would be some pretty fucking awesome promotion for F0rd. Personally, I just want to make some steel. I think that including editing and post-production it is possible to do this whole thing within $50k. I'd be acting as executive producer and host.

Is this completely fucking insane and elaborate and random? Yes, it certainly is. Have I pulled off crazier and more elaborate things than this? Why yes, I believe that I have.

5:10 p.m. - 2011-01-12

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