cellini's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Where the Fuck is My MacArthur Genius Grant? Well yes of course I'm fucking pissed about the MacArthur Genius Grants just announced today. WHY WASN'T I ON THE FUCKING LIST??? Look at that. Those cheeky fuckers made me use multiple question marks at the end of a sentence. I don't *do* that shit. No seriously. Where the fuck is my MacArthur genius grant? I think I've earned it. I have slaved away for years in order to produce tangible benefits to society in the arenas of environmental activism, gastronomy and literature. I've made major sacrifices. I've shown real benefits. They gave one of those grants to a fucking poet. A poet WHO JUST WON A FUCKING PULITZER. Yeah, they still give out Pulitzers for poetry. I know -- what the fuck? That's like handing out a Nobel prize for taking a shit. Why is this fucking 65 year old poet -- who has a paying job as a college professor and just got like $100k from the Pulitzer people -- getting MY MacArthur genius grant? How many endangered species has *she* saved? How many nights have her kids gone hungry so that she could like save the endangered flying squid or whatever the fuck through iambic fucking pentameter? That shit pays out $50k a year for 5 years running. I could do a lot of real work on that. I'm not even fucking kidding here. I'm fucking suffering day after day to accomplish this work that I'm doing to halt extinctions and they're handing $250k to an employed poet with a Pulitzer WHO ISN'T EVEN VERY ATTRACTIVE. No, I'm dead serious. I want my fucking MacArthur Genius Grant already. I've earned it. You look at the typical list of recipients from any given year and I will take the Pepsi challenge against at least 70% of them. Not all of them, mind. Plenty of deserving people get the MacArthur. I'm just saying that my work trumps a great many of them and that I belong in the fucking club already. They could cross off, say, all of the retarded fucking poets in order to make room for the people like myself who are actually doing something for the world. Ok, I should explain that I don't actually *hate* poetry. I just have no respect for it. As a profession. Even Ginsberg did other things and entertained people and was Wm. Burroughs' lit agent and was responsible for at least one really good song by The Clash. Kipling wrote proper short stories. Tennyson was probably sucking off Queen Victoria or something. WHERE IS MY FUCKING MACARTHUR GENIUS GRANT ALREADY!? 12:19 a.m. - 2011-09-21 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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