cellini's Diaryland Diary

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Are we dating or play-dating?

Something's happening with Lauren. I don't know what it is.

Mutual good friends of ours had a double-header of a concert tonight. Lauren's best friend was up first with his band, and then another friend of ours was on next. The night had a Stranger Things theme. I brought both of my kids (10 and 13) and Lauren brought her daughter (9).

I should mention that I take both my kids to all kinds of concerts and art openings and shit and I've been doing this for years. They are fully socially capable around adults, having been raised in this environment. When we go to a show like this, they know most of the people in the band and they know the bartender and half the people in the audience. So on one hand it looks weird, because it's a nightclub late at night, but my kids know all of these people are are dressed the part and they are fully a part of the scene. Normally they are the only kids there.

Anyway, Lauren brought her daughter. We spent most of the night hanging out together (she sang a few songs with the first band) and we snuck out for cigarettes a few times.

It felt very date-y. She stands really close to me, lots of eye contact.

Our kids completely hit it off. Harry and Evelyn (Lauren's daughter) were glued to each other all night and Ida (13) hung with them a lot, too.

Lauren confided in me that Eveyln wants to hang out with Harry again. Which is a bit of a thing, because she's homeschooling her and she doesn't get to hang out with other kids enough.

Now Lauren also says she wants us all to spend time together again soon. Me being a former professional hunter and outdoorsman, she wants me to go do stuff in the woods with them. And suggested a Goonies movie night with us and all the kids together.

I'm working to make sense of all of this. Is she actually interested in dating me? Or is this just her wanting our kids to play together? Or both? Both would be good.

We've done, like, four date-ish things together in the last two weeks. But none of them have been explicitly and clearly a date, with a lets-kiss-now opportunity.

I don't know what's happening here. She's really pretty, and hot, and talented, and smart and capable. I consider her wife material.

The night could have been a bit awkward, because Kerri was there with her husband. Kerri is the super hot poly redhead whom I have been fucking for a few months now. I don't want to have to explain that to Lauren at this point, but fortunately I didn't have to because Kerri understood that I didn't want to be kissing or otherwise all over someone I am casually dating in front of my kids.

I should also say that if Lauren and I start dating, I will break it off with Kerri. Who is great, but I'm her side piece so there is no future.

A few weeks ago she brought her husband with her to another club night thing with me. No kids or Lauren there for that. It was super hot having my hands all over this chick and making out with her while her husband was right there with his arm around her. Like, people were watching with their mouths open, stunned, while two dude were all over this same woman at the same time, sharing her.

Kerri is a lot of fun. I really like fucking her. I especially love fucking her because she is someone else's wife. And I'm making a point of not getting too attached. First, she is happily married and will stay that way. What I really want is my own wife and she's never going to be that for me, so there's a level that things have to stay at.

But even if she was fully available, Kerri would probably not work out as a girlfriend or wife because she doesn't have a something going on. She's a physical therapist and is really into playing Settlers of Kataan and has some other interests that consist of consuming things that other people came up with. She doesn't create anything.

Me dating 'civilians' does not work. I need to be with someone who creates things and has something of their own going on. A creative partner.

Lauren very much fits that bill. She's toured Europe many times as a musician, recorded half a dozen albums, made many music videos and has a very substantial body of work as a songwriter. I am very, very impressed with her work.

My kids are sort of stunned at the fact that we're hanging out with her and her daughter now. They know her from going to her shows, listening to her albums and watching her videos on Youtube. She is a big deal rock star to them. Hanging out backstage with her daughter is a pretty surreal thing for them, I think. I've walked in on Ida watching her videos on Youtube many times.

Probably I should ask her out on a real date in the next few days. Like, unambiguously. This all started when I invited her to be my date to the opening gala for the film festival when she had contributed a song to the film I had premiering.

She's really pretty. I want to kiss her a lot. Also cum inside of her. She's definitely wife material.

12:53 a.m. - 2017-11-25

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