cellini's Diaryland Diary

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My Concealed Weapon Permit is Here!

Woo hoo! My concealed weapon permit was issued today! I have it in my wallet right now. I'm psyched.

I have been carrying my .38 in my briefcase for weeks now and occasionally wearing it in a holster on my hip on account of the spate of random gang assaults that has been happening of late. But to carry it in my briefcase (out of sight) I've had to have a cable lock run through the cylinder, rendering the pistol unable to fire. That way it isn't legally a concealed weapon since it isn't readily accessible as a weapon.

After work I will unlock it. There isn't really any place in my outfit today where I could conceal a weapon except maybe under the leg of my jeans on the side of my boot. And I don't have a holster that would be secure enough like that. So I suppose I will just clip the holster to the top of a compartment inside my briefcase and have the zipper open. I could draw quickly enough like that in the highly unlikely event that I should need the weapon.

By the way, I should say that I am not paranoidly expecting that every trip to the grocery store will result in ninjas jumping out at me. On any given day, the odds of me needing the weapon are very low. But what about over the course of a few years? The odds become pretty good of there being some moment in the next year where I am really fucking glad I have that weapon with me. The guy in line in front of me at the liquor store pulls out a gun and tried to rob the place. Or I'm walking to my car after dark and one of the local gangs of wanna-be Crips accosts me and attempts one of their beat-downs (something like a dozen of these have happened in the last 2 months, most within a few blocks of where I park). Or there is some Virginia Tech massacre type thing. Who knows?

It's sort of like wearing a seat belt. If I really thought for sure that I was going to get into a car accident today then I would not have left the house. But I wear my seat belt just in case. And because I am in the habit of wearing a seatbelt, those few times I have been in some type of car accident resulted in no injury to me.

I also keep fire extinguishers everywhere. In each car and all around the house. Because I'm just that fucking paranoid. Years go by and they don't generally get used. But those very few times that I did need a fire extinguisher, I REALLy fucking needed it.

So. Seatbelts, fire extinguishers, first aid kit, jumper cables in the trunk and a revolver in the briefcase. I see all of these things as prudent to have available, just in case. I don't expect everyone to have these things. Well, do wear the seatbelt, please. I just think that the world is a better place if there are a few people like me who carry around fire extinguishers and jumper cables and first aid kits and revolvers to save someone else's ass when they need help.

2:42 p.m. - 2007-08-14

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