cellini's Diaryland Diary

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Making perfect gumbo does not mean that I am not in a loop.

I'm just avoiding the manuscript now. I kinda know what needs to be done. It is a big effort. Either I re-write the first chapters or I cut them and come in with action. I gotta do one of those two things.

Today I decided to make gumbo, which is an all-day effort. It also meant not working on my book. Hours of shopping for ingredients. This time I made my own stock. I took about a pound and a half of crayfish, pulled the tails to add at the end and put everything else of them into the stock. And the shells of the shrimp, and some onion and shallot remnants, and a few carrots and some parsley and half a tomato and some black pepper corns and fresh thyme and basil and a bit of salt.

Then I also decided to smoke the onions and bell peppers for my trinity. I didn't think that the celery would take the smoke very well, owing to its shape. Sliced onion and bell peppers have a sort of hood shape that holds the smoke from a hard wood fire within them. I also lightly smoked a few catfish filets from last season.

My roux was dirty blonde. Maybe I should have gone darker.

The result is a poem in vegetables and seafood. A magnificent gumbo. One which I have nobody to feed the entire gallon to.

This is one of the alternating weeks in which my son is not with me. My daughter has her own place and life now in college.

I'm giving up on Alex. I should probably tell her that I give up on her. It won't matter. She's apparently an NPC or one of the figures in West World, acting out her story on repeat indefinitely without any ability to take an opportunity to interrupt it and do something else.

Are there people who are on sort of AI loops in some minimally conscious state? It would be so easy to put faith in one just because it has a pretty exterior and a compelling backstory.

How would one know if one was in a similar state?


3:33 a.m. - 2023-04-13

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