cellini's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- UTR 2.0 and fuck I want to go home Yeah, it's bad. I'm running on empty. Just now I pitched a story on Un1te the R1ght 2.O to M0therJ0nes. I know shit that nobody else knows. I have the sources and background. Shit, I'm in the cockpit of news. But I don't want to push hard back into freelancing. I'm sick of freelancing. I spend about 30 hours each week on applying to jobs. Yesterday I applied for a fellowship at Propublica and a position with the Clint0n Foundation. One of these things will hit. One of these applications. Fuck, I hope so. I've been trying so hard. I've applied for positions with the NYT, NG, the WP, and a dozen communications jobs with corporations and NGOs. And meanwhile more people have watched my film and tell me that its the most moving thing they've ever seen. But I don't know a fucking thing about how to promote a movie. This chick on OKCupid is super interested in me. But deep in her profile questions she says that she doesn't want to have kids. We click in every other way. I want to have a baby pretty much yesterday. I just want to get married and have babies and puppies and plant a garden. Why is this so hard? I want to go home. I want someone to come home to. I don't want to be famous again. I don't care about credit -- I let Natalie have all the credit for what we just did. I don't give a fuck about that -- I've been famous before, so many times. It never did me any good. I just want to go home. Oh, I just want to go home. I want to go home. I want to wrap my arms around a woman and go home. I don't want to do this any more -- I don't want to be this any more -- I want to go home. 12:27 a.m. - 2018-03-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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